I miss being able to jump in my crappy white and gray Buick Regal and drive down the road to go to the mall with my friends. I miss high school football games and the sense of camaraderie when your characteristically-horrible team wins. I want to be able to walk down the dim, crowded hallways at Beavercreek High School and recognize the faces around me. I want to go back to a place where I knew the life stories of the people I came into contact with. I love Ohio University, don't get me wrong; I'm just afraid that I will never have that same sense of belonging again. I want that level of comfort and familiarity that I had in Beavercreek. But can that ever be attained in a place with 20,000 people? Can I ever feel at home when I have to reestablish myself in a new dorm each year?
Now of course this blog sounds like a whiny, homesick little girl who doesn't want to step out of her comfort zone; and that was exactly the type of message I was hoping to avoid.
I'm not really homesick in the sense that I want to go back, because I don't. I want to stay here; I want to succeed here. I'm simply contemplating how surprised I am that I actually miss a place which I hated for years. I'm the classic example of someone who thought their suburban childhood was torturous, until they were free.
I'm ready for the next step in my life. I love that, in college, you are able to establish strong friendships quickly, because you're essentially together most of the day, every day. I am so excited, and slightly overwhelmed, by the abundance of opportunities around campus. The number of speakers and inspiring people I've been able to meet is amazing, and I've only been here for a month. OU is amazing and I can't wait to continue my life here.
Photo by Nathan Bartell.
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