I can't believe you take it so serious... seriously.

I'm tired of everyone trying to document everything. I hate Facebook and I hate everyone's desperate need to take a million pictures to put on Facebook.

I wish we could just live in the moment.

Not that I'm not guilty of doing all these things, but I wish I didn't.

Earlier this week, we had a few inches of snow and a lot of ice, so classes were canceled. Now if there is one thing that can motivate college kids to go outside and celebrate, it's a snow day. Everyone slept in until past noon, something which was particularly noticeable when girls were lining up for the shower around one-o-clock, and then got ready to go out in the snow.

And what did everyone have to grab before heading out? Their camera. So we proceeded outside; ten friends, ten cameras, and very little fun. We quickly realized that there was no point in taking pictures... since everyone was taking pictures. The majority of us returned our cameras either to our rooms or our pockets, and the day was fantastic after that.

But the point I'm trying to make in this very random and likely to be deleted blog is that there is no point in trying to record everything... if you aren't even going to be there to experience it in the first place.

One of my favorite bands, Cobra Starship, set up a camera to film them while they wrote their new album in a cabin in Pennsylvania. One night, after hours of work, a few bottles of wine, and a bottle of vodka, they began calling fans. My friend came into my room to inform me of this development and I pulled up the website at once. The first person whom they called after I began watching spent the first five minutes of her conversation telling Gabriel Saporta, the lead singer, to "hold on a sec" while she tried to find her camera and begin recording the conversation.

As I watched, I thought how pathetic she was to be blowing an opportunity to talk to him, but then I realized that I would probably do the same thing. Because otherwise, what would I put online for everyone to see? How would I prove to anyone that he had actually called to talk to me? Our society has become one in which the experiences we have are not as important as the stories and the proof that we had them.

Gabe told the girl on the phone, "Stop trying to record this. You're wasting the whole conversation; just live in the moment," and after she kept ignoring him in favor of a camera, he hung up on her.

Since that night I've been thinking about my life and about all the things I've missed while trying to capture proof of the moment-- while looking for a story to tell. I'm determined to stop wasting my life taking pictures and trying to have something to brag about. I'm just going to enjoy my experiences and live in the moment. Next time I go to a concert or some sort of event, I may take my camera, but it will stay in my pocket for everything except a meet-and-greet. Anyone with me?

In Athens? No.

Are you registered to vote? Of course.

In Athens? No. And I don't want to.

I refuse to vote in an election in a city that I have only been in for two months. It's not a matter of me not considering Athens to be home; it's a matter of me not wanting to affect issues and candidates about which I have very little knowledge.

I've lived in Beavercreek for eighteen years. I know most of the candidates; I know many of the issues. I know how I want to vote, and the vote will still affect me for five months out of the year.

I've been in Athens for six weeks; at the time of the election, I will have been here for about two months. I know none of the candidates; I know few of the issues. I don't want to affect the Athens community by my uninformed college vote.

A few of the students voting in the coming election will have researched the candidates and issues, and I think that's fantastic. But the majority of OU students will vote randomly: for the name that they've seen on the most posters, the name that sounds best, the issue that on the surface seems promising, etc.

I could be one of the few who researches, but I really don't have the time. By the next election I will be prepared to vote in Athens, but this election, I don't want to change something that I'm not well-informed about.

Yesterday I was confirmed that my decision was correct when a student in my Public Speaking class told everyone to vote at home. He is from Athens, and he doesn't want college students changing things which they know nothing about.

And don't try telling me that my absentee ballot won't be counted; I live in a Republican military community. They count our absentee ballots.

Doubt.

A few days ago, a kid in my dorm told me "It's hard to make it as a music journalist." Although I already knew this, what he said struck a chord. For the first time in my life, I doubted my career choice. I only started writing less than two years ago; what if journalism just isn't for me? Some of the other Scripps students in my dorm have wanted to work in the news industry for their whole lives. I didn't even consider the option until I was well into my junior year of high school. Before then I wanted to be a rockstar, a lawyer, an entreprenuer.

But then I think, if not journalism... what? There really is no other option. I chose journalism because I love to write, but I'm also not really good at anything else. I can read, I can write, I love music; it just seemed like the perfect option. Now don't get me wrong. I love writing, I love working in the news industry, and right now, this is what I want to do with my life. I'm just afraid that it won't last. Especially when I get out into the world and struggle. I'm not used to struggling. I hate to admit it, but things tend to come easily to me and I generally get what I want. But now at Scripps I'm surrounded by people who have been writers for years and I begin to doubt myself and my choice.

I don't doubt that I can do this, I'm just worried that as the competition gets tougher, I won't want to anymore. I guess that if that ever happens, I will have options... I just hope I've finally made the choice I'm going to stick with.

But suburbs are so boring...

For eighteen years, I hated living in my rich, upper-middle class, heterogeneous suburb. I wanted nothing more than to free myself from the boring oppression that was Beavercreek, Ohio. But now... I miss it. Of course I miss my family, but it's more than that. I don't just miss the people. I miss the place; I miss the lifestyle.

I miss being able to jump in my crappy white and gray Buick Regal and drive down the road to go to the mall with my friends. I miss high school football games and the sense of camaraderie when your characteristically-horrible team wins. I want to be able to walk down the dim, crowded hallways at Beavercreek High School and recognize the faces around me. I want to go back to a place where I knew the life stories of the people I came into contact with.

I love Ohio University, don't get me wrong; I'm just afraid that I will never have that same sense of belonging again. I want that level of comfort and familiarity that I had in Beavercreek. But can that ever be attained in a place with 20,000 people? Can I ever feel at home when I have to reestablish myself in a new dorm each year?

Now of course this blog sounds like a whiny, homesick little girl who doesn't want to step out of her comfort zone; and that was exactly the type of message I was hoping to avoid.

I'm not really homesick in the sense that I want to go back, because I don't. I want to stay here; I want to succeed here. I'm simply contemplating how surprised I am that I actually miss a place which I hated for years. I'm the classic example of someone who thought their suburban childhood was torturous, until they were free.

I'm ready for the next step in my life. I love that, in college, you are able to establish strong friendships quickly, because you're essentially together most of the day, every day. I am so excited, and slightly overwhelmed, by the abundance of opportunities around campus. The number of speakers and inspiring people I've been able to meet is amazing, and I've only been here for a month. OU is amazing and I can't wait to continue my life here.

Photo by Nathan Bartell.

Sororities...

Someone please explain to me why someone would spend more than two hours getting ready for a party, when she only intends to stay at the party for one hour. I have no idea why it happens, but it is the world of the sorority pledge. Not that the entire sorority system doesn't baffle me, but this part of it is bothering me most at the moment.

I'm sitting in my dorm room, trying to get some work done, but there are screaming girls running in and out of my room as they borrow each others' clothes, do their hair, put on make-up, and listen to crappy music. I stayed out of my room and gave my roommate an hour of this before I finally gave up and tried to come get some work done, despite the giggling and screaming. The readying then continued for an additional hour and as far as I can see, little change has been made.

The strangest part came to me when I heard the following conversation: "I have an eight-o-clock class tomorrow, so I will only be staying for like at most an hour."

Is a party really worth attending if you spend more than twice as much time getting ready for the party?

Really? Are we still in high school?

The concept of "study tables" is completely lost on me. I understand that our learning community directors want us to learn good study habits, get used to coming to the library, etc., but I personally feel that studying in a hot room in an uncomfortable chair with seven other people is hardly a good way to study.

In fact, before coming to this session today, I was in my cool, comfortable dorm room, studying for Economics. I then had to leave the peace and convenience of Washington Hall, pack away all my books, and walk ten minutes to Alden Library, where I now sit, unable to study and instead writing this blog. Why can't I study here, you ask? Because I am one of those crazy people who is totally OCD about reading. It has to be silent for me to absorb anything. Next to me, a girl is clacking away at her keyboard. Across from me is a boy with the squeaky pencil. Down the table a bit, people are talking. Not to mention the fact that I wasted ten minutes getting here, fifteen minutes packing and unpacking my notebooks, books, and ancient computer, and I will soon waste another ten minutes walking home.

The fact that I wasted more than thirty minutes to get here and get set up isn't even the point; the point is that I am an eighteen-year-old college student and I should be able to study my own way, on my own terms. Don't get me wrong; I'm not mad. I think our peer mentor and LC teachers are all fantastic. I even understand why this would be effective for some people. I just think this is a pointless exercise for me to partake in.

PS: Whisperers, keyboard clacker, and squeaky pencil boy... I did not mean to offend.

The Semi-colon.

Why is it that no one uses semi-colons anymore? I feel very out of place using my favorite punctuation mark in a world where it has become almost obsolete. Periods make writings look choppy, while commas can make a sentence seem long and unreadable. The semi-colon is perfect because it breaks up a run-on sentence while still keeping a good flow, without the finality of a period. While working at a newspaper over the summer, some of the editors attacked me for daring to use semi-colons, while others embraced what it brought to my writing. Our society so often misuses commas; proper semi-colon placement could fix all of that.

The Beginning.

Ever since the days of Xanga popularity, I've enjoyed blogging. Regardless of whether or not people actually read my thoughts, it's nice to know that I can come back, years from now, and get to know my past self. I look back at my old Xanga blogs and I am able to recall memories, some good, some bad, and I am able to think about lessons I learned, days I cherish, and situations I regret. I look back at the comments left by friends, enemies, aquaintences, and I find myself thinking about how much better everything is now, but I also think of how I never could have gotten to this point without those experiences. Three years ago, my freshman year of high school ended, and with it, my daily blogging. I've tried many times over the years to get back to it, but with little success.

Recently I started a music blog. I was working at the newspaper in my city and I was in the Metro section, writing breaking news pieces. Don't get me wrong, I was completely ecstatic about the internship, but I've always been an entertainment girl, and the paper didn't offer that outlet. So I started an entertainment blog where I could review CDs, talk about music, movies, whatever. If you wish, you can check out that blog at www.fragilecapricorn.blogspot.com. Bear in mind, however, that poor college students can't afford many CDs, so reviews will likely be few and far between.

This blog was created a few weeks ago to post vlogs by my friend Brenna and I. Those videos are now posted solely on YouTube, and this blog will be used to discuss journalism, the media, life as an OU j-schooler, etc., as per the suggestion of Prof. Stewart.

If you like it, read it; if you don't, that's okay to.